A quirky Kiwi caper Quentin Tarantino could admire, LOWDOWN DIRTY CRIMINALS is a kooky coaster ride B picture with shooting, rooting, tooting, and a postmortem penis amputation.
When Freddy loses his job delivering pizza, he and his best buddy Marvin find work with a small-time crook Spiggs. After they botch a straightforward job, Spiggs gives them a stay of execution by employing them as assassins, sending them to kill gangster Donny Kong who’s been slipping his schlong to Spriggs spouse.
A case of mistaken identity with a morbidly obese cohort of Kong eventuates with the wrong guy dead, Freddy and Marvin find themselves crossing paths with someone even scarier than their boss – a cold as concrete blonde known as The Upholsterer and her hapless henchmen, Semo and Roy.
A dismembered dick is just part of the gore fest as The Upholsterer dissects and disembowels a body suspected of concealing contraband.
It’s all gross dirty fun, made all the more memorable by Rebecca Gibney’s sinister, icy portrayal as The Upholsterer.
As dopey duos go, LOWDOWN DIRTY CRIMINALS goes for gold twice.
James Rolleston and Samuel Austin as the hapless, haphazard Freddy and Marvin are mirror matched in mirth and mayhem by Robbie Magasiva and Cohen Holloway’s Semo and Roy, a race to the dumbest by the dumber and dumber.
And there’s a delightful turn by Olivia Morphew as a take no prisoner, take no shit, gun toting teenage motel receptionist. She deserves a sequel!
Director Paul Murphy gleefully puts David Brechin-Smith’s script through its outrageous paces delivering a brisk, crisp under ninety minute crime spree.
